Author Archives: Zack Stovall

Trying To Stifle Rising Skepticism For This Show ‘Memphis Beat’

I don’t make a habit of catching TNT dramas. Mainly because, for the most part, they, ya know, suck heinously. So when I first heard that TNT was releasing a show called “Memphis Beat” this summer, I was immediately like, “Oh, no they di’n’t.” Not in my city, where I lived for four years during college.Continue reading “Trying To Stifle Rising Skepticism For This Show ‘Memphis Beat’”

If You Can’t Not Vote For This Guy, Maybe Just Laugh At Him A Little

Here’s the original campaign video from Alabama (of course) gubernatorial candidate Tim James, who doesn’t get why all these dumb, dark people don’t speak no English. Here’s the parody of the original, which I’m worried is funny enough to get this guy more votes. As one of my friends says, the way he stares downContinue reading “If You Can’t Not Vote For This Guy, Maybe Just Laugh At Him A Little”

Not To Take Anything Away From That Mother’s Day Perfect Game, But Did He Do It On LSD? Didn’t Think So

As you know, yesterday Oakland Athletics pitcher Dallas Braden pitched a perfect game. That means 27 batters, 27 outs. Only 109 pitches. Pretty sick stuff. But color me unimpressed. Okay, okay, I’m just kidding. It’s ridiculously impressive. But Dock Ellis pitched a no-hitter one time. And while I understand that that – while just asContinue reading “Not To Take Anything Away From That Mother’s Day Perfect Game, But Did He Do It On LSD? Didn’t Think So”

Lista De Actividades Para Cinco De Mayo

So it’s Cinco de Mayo again. Every year, it seems to be on a Wednesday, and throngs of people ditch work a little early to head to the one or two authentic Mexican restaurants in the city, and wait around shoulder to shoulder with a bunch of other white people in loosened neckties for overpriced margaritas andContinue reading “Lista De Actividades Para Cinco De Mayo”

For Once I’d Like To Go To A Cardinals Game Where Someone Doesn’t Get Tasered

BRO! NOT AWESOMES! This kid crashed the Cards at Phillies game last night in the eighth inning immediately before crashing into the ground violently. It’s MLB policy to not encourage other insanely-brilliant-cargo-short-wearing brolumni from doing the same thing by showing them on TV, but cuts to the Cardinals dug out showed everyone grinning from ear to ear andContinue reading “For Once I’d Like To Go To A Cardinals Game Where Someone Doesn’t Get Tasered”

Welcome to Arizona!

Hello neighbors! Welcome to Arizona – the Grand Canyon State! We here at the Department of Tourism and Culture would like to welcome some of you with open arms to our fine state! You may have heard some hubbub about our legislature and its recent bill regarding illegal immigration. However, we at the ADTC want you to know thisContinue reading “Welcome to Arizona!”