This is a thing


How are you? I’m doing well. My name is Zack, and I like saying, writing, and drawing things. It’s not like I don’t like a lot of other things, like cake and pictures of dogs doing human activities, but this is mainly just about the talking, the writing, and the drawing things.

This is my website, which is a thing that exists on the Internet. This has all of that stuff I was talking about earlier in a way that you can find it easily on your very own computer, AND it has many ways in which you can get in touch with me. That is neat!

I’d love to get in touch with you if you’d like to get in touch with me. Click through the site, and if there’s anything I can do for you, feel free to call, write, or release your pigeon from your fax machine.



PS – One time I hit an owl with a snowball from about 15 feet below and 25 feet away (a²+b²=c², c= 29.1547594742 feet total) from him. It’s by far the most athletic thing I’ve ever done, and I live in constant fear that the owl is still hunting me.


Somewhat Recent Happenings in 2016:

I’m performing at the Show Em Comedy Festival in Columbia, Missouri Sept. 2-3! I’ll be doing stand up and performing with Sketchpad Comedy and The Catalogue, so you’ll have three chances to hurl vegetables at me! Can’t miss!

Fancy Things: LIVE!” is a go! Come to Blank Space on August 17th, featuring art by Chris Melton, comedy by Ryan Dalton and Kenny Kinds, and everything you’d ever need to know about how to be FANCY. For more info on the genesis of this Fancy bidness, click here.