BREAKING NEWS: Nic Cage Is Bad At His Job

INTERNET RULE: When four different people send you the same Youtube clip that you yourself have already seen, YOU MUST PUT IT ON YOUR OWN SITE.

Here we have Nic Cage, VENERABLE ACTOR OF STAGE AND SCREEN, losing his mind in a variety of different film genres. You have him screaming in science fiction, in comic book movies, in biopics, in suspenseful thrillers, in comedies, and in some sort of artsy fartsy movie in which he breaks down and paints himself black DAS RAYCESS DAS ARTSY.

I don’t think I’m breaking any sort of cinematic ground by saying that Nicolas Cage, NEPHEW OF NOTED DIRECTOR FRANICS FORD COPPOLA, is not good at being an actor. Which is a shame since, you know, that’s what he does for a living. He, at one point, had enough money to purchase dinosaur eggs and Egyptian sarcophaguses (with the mummy still in them [SpOoOoOkY!]), but went bankrupt and had to start taking every role he could get.

Case in point: The Sorcerer’s Apprentice. I’m not saying that movie sucked, because I didn’t see it, but that movie sucked. I guess we should just be thankful that this deluge of Cage and Cage Rage occurred prior to the recent wave of 3D everything. I don’t care how cool the comic book was, I don’t want to see Nic Cage’s face burn into a skull in any more dimensions than I have to.

But this? I can get behind this (unless Nic Cage is in the sequel).

Published by Zack Stovall

Writer living in New York, NY.

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