So this is a toilet, not a teleportation platform or tube conveyance or anything really space-aged or awesome. Just a pisser.
It comes up out of the ground at night in a neighborhood that apparently has problems with the locals pee-peeing hither and yon after a night of old-fashioned binge drinking. But isn’t part of the fun of old-fashioned binge drinking finding clandestine/creative places to whiz on the way home? If this is really a port-o-potty, why can’t I knock it over? Maybe that’s just me and my nostalgia.
There might be other opportunities presented. One friend suggested that the ultimate “huzzah!” may come from mounting the phantom toilet and peeing off it. That’ll show em! Another friend mentioned a toilet in Europe that is surrounded by reflective, one-sided glass. Everyone on the outside sees a mirrored cylinder. You, on the other hand, see everyone…while going No. 2!
The phantom toilets, however, do not accept No. 2. Apparently this city has no Taco Bell, Jack in the Box, or any other late night drunk food which would create such inevitable hazards. I guess we can scratch the city of Memphis off that list.
I know someone who took a dump on Beale Street. On it. That is all.